Ulazi Mujo u kucu i kaže:
- Fato pakuj se dobio sam na lotu!!!

Fata vice:
- Super, jel da se pakujem za planinu ili za more?

Mujo odgovara:
- Kako hoceš, samo odjebi odavde!!!!!!

 While in the playground with his friend, Little Johnny noticed that Jimmy was wearing a brand new, shiny watch.

"Did you get that for your birthday?" asked Little Johnny.

"Nope." replied Jimmy.

"Well, did you get it for Christmas then?".

Again Jimmy says "Nope."

"You didn't steal it, did you?" asks Little Johnny.

"No," said Jimmy.

"I went into Mom and Dad's bedroom the other night when they were 'doing the nasty'. Dad gave me his watch to get rid of me.

Little Johnny was extremely impressed with this idea, and extremely jealous of Jimmy's new watch. He vowed to get one for himself.

That night, he waited outside his parents' bedroom until he heard the unmistakable noises of lovemaking.

Just then, he swung the door wide open and boldly strode into the bedroom. His father, caught in mid stroke, turned and said angrily. "What do you want now?"

"I wanna watch," Johnny replied.

Without missing a stroke, his father said, "Fine. Stand in the corner and watch, but keep quiet."

 Kako doci u Rim ako te napadne lav u pustinji, a ti imas samo jabuku ?
--------
Bacis jabuku, a posto jabuka ne pada daleko od stabla popnes se na stablo, s
obzirom da si se spasio, padne ti kamen sa srca i to pravo na lava, koji
ostane momentalno mrtav. Posto si namagarcio lava, sjednes na magarca i
odjases po putu, a svi putevi vode u rim ....

  zeljko   Jedna od boljih stvari koje sam pročitao u zadnje vrijeme!